|
I may offend some of you!
|
I think John Lennon said it best "Nobody told me there'd be days like these, strange days indeed!" Somewhere out there he is looking upon me from behind those legendary round glasses saying "I wrote that one just for you"
So I'll start by saying I really do try and do my part for the environment - I have this giant blue bins that the borough that I live in is supposed to collect once a week on a given day. Like the good samaritan that I hope that I am - I put all recyclable goods in that bin and put it to the curb, following the directions that the city's overlord has given us. Place it as close to the sidewalk as possible but not on the sidewalk, wheels must be in the back away from the street, and it can't be open even a wee bit - if you fail any of these criteria it won't be collected - because the guy will have to do extra work (extra work? it'll take two seconds). So needless to say all this has been done but once again my bin has not been picked up for a second week. But to my surprise many people on the street also have mentioned that their bin is full and no pick up has occured. So I must admit, I became that guy, the guy I hoped I never would become - I called city hall.
I must preface this by saying - the mayor of Cote Saint Luc (my borough) is my age and I know him since we were teen-agers. I once told him that I would run against him and that day may come sooner than any of us thought. So I call city hall - a kind woman, not a recording answers - good start. She asks me what she can do for me - I tell her my situation and she transfers me to the person she "thinks" can be of help. I get a answering machine and I leave a message. 3 hours later another person, not the one I left a message for calls back - saying I was transfered to the wrong person but that woman passed along my dossier. Dossier? It's garbage - do I really need a dossier. Here is a brief part of the conversation (if I was more savvy with this computer/interweb thing I would have recorded the conversation and let you all listen in, but here is the gist of it. I tell her the bin has not been picked up in two weeks. I also want to mention that this neighborhood is mostly Jewish, with a large Italian, Greek and Russian population. So no one really speaks French. This woman could barely put together an sentence in English - I think city employees should be in touch with the comunity they serve, so please lady go take a Yiddish, Greek or Russian lesson. I know I live in a French province, but the option to get served (not helped) in the language of my choice I thought was still an option in this wonderful regime in which I choose to live under.
Woman: "Did you put it outside?"
Joey: "Yeah"
Woman: "Are you sure it was the blue one?"
Do I need to go on - needless to say no one at the city can imagine that a city employee is a slacker - I'm clearly an idiot in their eyes and don't know how to move a giant box to the curb - even though I have done this with no problems in the past. I joke around on stage how if I was leader of this country everyone would get a tazer gun and would be able to fire it off once a day. Well to that woman I say be glad that law has come into play because you would have been zapped. Her solution is that I should "stroll" 15 blocks with this barge in tow and deposit it at a communal drop off site. What should be dropped off is this woman's city salary. so I guess you read it hear first - in three years I just may have to - yup, announce the fact that I will run for mayor of Cote Saint Luc - and the first thing I do is call every department and anyone who treats me like a 5 year old, gets the old Donald Trump "you're fired"
What a day indeed city employees, old ladies paying with exact change in front of me at the pharmacy (I joke about these things on stage) so I guess it is like John Lennon said "Instant Karma - it's gonna get you!"
Keep laughing and Vote Elias in 2013. |
|
|
<< Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 Next >>
|
 |
Mon - Sep 13
|
Fundraiser
Baton Rouge Decarie |
|
|
|
The CJAD Comedy Show
with Joey Elias
Weeknights from 11:00PM |
Joey on Facebook
|
